You know what makes you so angry when you’re already a
little cranky?
I’ll tell you.
Have you ever gone to take something out of your closet and
the hanger gets caught on another hanger? Doesn’t that just make you crazy?
You’re already mentally working on something and you’re a little heated about
it and then you go to grab a shirt, a simple, thoughtless action that you
complete effortlessly everyday and then it catches something. Another hanger. A
strap in a dress. Doesn’t matter. You wind up in battle.
I call it Coat Hanger Fencing. That initial snag makes you
give it a little jerk. Maybe up and to the right and that will unhook it. But
no. Again you try. And again, until you’re in a wide-legged crouch with your
head leaned way back, one hand on your hip and flailing your other arm up and around, stabbing left,
right, up. How about an unexpected JAB! A quick shimmy.
Nothing enrages me more and as I antagonize myself by refusing
to simply stop and untangle the hangers, my closet falls to pieces. Neighboring
dresses slip off their plastic pegs. Nearby blouses jump ship, floating
delicately down to the pile of by-standing casualties. Belts whip around my
head and sweater sleeves blend into the storm while I continue to leap forwards
and back. My balestra lunges will surly catch that attack hanger off-guard.
The shirt I wanted fell to the ground ages ago but it’s the principle.
I cannot be defeated by a wire hanger. I WILL have this hanger. And in the end,
whether the fencing tactics do the untangling or I concede and go in manually, when I finally
hold that sole hanger in my stinging, wire-whipped hand, I feel no sense of relief.
For having even engaged in a battle with a coat hanger takes away the pleasures
of victory. I’ve won nothing. Red faced and angry, I cast that hanger to the
ground, my heart pounding and my ears hot with rage.
Look at the state of this morning's attack hanger.
Just makes me SO angry.
No comments:
Post a Comment