Creative Things and A Lack of Concern

Does this feel like a cop out year of blog posts? Lately I've been marveling at my lack of introspection and deep thinking. I met with an artsy friend of mine to discuss artsy things and once on the topic of it all, forgetting about my home life and pets and family and whatnot, I swirled down the vortex of artsy struggles and realized that I haven't thought about, let alone sat to write about, these sorts of things in quite some time. Why not? I wondered as my art friend ranted on the trials of representation and character development. Well, I guess I've just been all distracted and happy. And that's when it hit me. Brett has ruined me. My friend kept talking while I thought. Have I lost my creativity? Am I no longer a tortured soul? 

I ate a bunch of candy, got a bellyache and then went home. I told Brett what he has done to me. As someone who feels no need to create something about their experiences, he was rather unfazed by my revelation and dare I say, felt no desire to take responsibility for it. 
This is as far as I have gotten on this. I'm making an attempt to incorporate small, manageable segments of creative time each day. It's a muscle, you know. Take that Eisenhauer.

Now that my Lux brain is sufficiently on auto-pilot, I don't have many mental challenges taking place and often times that pleases me. As you know, I enjoy wallowing in peacefulness and tend to reject anything that disturbs my tranquility. But that's just my sleepy, poetic side. I also have a side that likes adventure and change, so equally as often I'm bored by the stillness I've curated for my life. I'd like to start another business. Or maybe buy someone else's. But I don't really want to do anything most days so perhaps I ought not? 
I have come up with what I think is a genius website/service/app thingy for the wedding industry but it would be a large and long-term undertaking. Maybe that's not so bad but it would also rely on my own ability to consistently find people to provide services and I'm just not that popular or well-connected. Ah but what else do you have to do? Well that's just it. Nothing. And I love to wake up to a day with nothing planned. 

I wonder if I could start a business giving other people ideas. I have lots of ideas. I just don't have any concern or motivation. 

Anyways, I've been plugging away in the flower shop and am happy to have both shop assistants home. They always know right where to lay down. 

Coming up: A full report on doggy behavior camp and what it's like at home, notes from Brett's big test, the October report, and the latest misadventures of Brett and Big Lue. 

September

Can you believe I'm just now getting to my September overview? All of my October weddings stayed put so I've been busy doing actual work. 

Ah September, a celebratory month. Hayden, Mom, Lee, Jeff, and Ellen all have birthdays in this month. Admittedly Brett and I were burnt out on birthdays by the end of it. So there was cake and a beach house HonBon hybrid. Brett took Jeff to Charlotte for a semi-surprise 40th birthday in their hometown. Pippa left and came home again, my gay friends got married, and we invented some tasty suppers. 

September in Photos:

Got my hands on the prettiest dahlias for Mom's birthday. I'm still thinking about them.

We managed to have a few Sunday dinners.

Liv pretends to like me and then turns on our friendship. This week she's on my bad list.

We've continued "discovery" game nights with Alex and Jessie. The pickin's ain't slim when it comes to the game stash. Jessie has a bountiful source: a cousin up north that sends her new, complicated games every year. They are in-depth, complex, and usually take us almost an hour to setup and understand before we can play. And by us I mean Jessie. The rest of us chat and snack while she works out the complicated matters for us. Once we get going, they're always much more exhilarating than your average board game.

For Ellie and Caroline's wedding I took it upon myself to make some grounded aisle markers because I've been wanting to for about a year but brides never want the extra expense. I'm quite pleased with how they turned out. 

We had a Leisure Club meeting at Carolyn's house. She made a beautiful lunch with dessert and a special lemonade. We ate and discussed trip options before realizing all of our schemes were for naught. I just think Ellen looks so beautiful in this photo.

Big Guy and I went out to eat for the first time since June. We had lunch and felt like wild, carefree teenagers. This coming Friday he has his PE exam up in Columbia. This is the final week for studying and he has just about thrown in the towel. He says he feels more confident now than he did as he headed in the first time but he's never so confident to suggest that he'll pass. I love a guy that puts himself down. 

And finally, we went for a last kayak ride - farewell to Bob's house vigil. That place is on to the next family of grandfolks and little tikes and pet cats and what not. We all hate to see it go. 

It's a magical place you know. 

Inmate Update

Sweet P served her time and is back home with us again. She's a whole new gal that knows how to behave in polite company. She sits and stays and comes on command - especially when wearing her zapping collar. As a whole she is much more calm, she's quieter, and she's less unsure about what to do with her downtime. I'm also convinced her voice is deeper. We still have to have training time with her but she went to college, graduated, and is now employed as a good dog in this house. 

We traded Grace for Pippa at a park in West Ashely. We left Grace in the car and we ran over to greet Pippa who seemed to experience momentary disbelief as she studied our faces. She was excited to see us but she maintained her composure as long as her trainer was around. Meanwhile, Grace watched from the car window, experiencing a disbelief of her own. They briefly sniffed each other as we made the swap and otherwise showed no feelings about each other. Grace decided to stick it to us and she ran off with the trainer without looking back. It wasn't until Brett, Pippa, and I got into the our car and drove away that we saw the reality in Grace's face. We had betrayed her and she watched us drive away. 

Since then, we've worked with Pip here at home and gotten reports from Grace's stay at camp.
"Grace is sweet but sassy and likes to do things on her own time." Grace huffs and sighs at the trainers while they try to get her up and moving for the day. One particular morning she was being extra stubborn and her trainer said, "I just can't with this dogs attitude today."

This makes us laugh. 

The interesting part will begin when Grace comes home and we have to train these two squirts to have nice thoughts about each other. It's going to be a handful.

In the meantime, Pip and I are making up for lost cuddles. 

Two Years

Yesterday made two years of marital harmony. Isn't that fun? It feels like many more than two years. As a married person, you feel you must acknowledge these checkpoints but I don't feel like an actually married person because I'm not yet burdened by a rigid partner nor have I learned anything particularly useful about being married. You're just there, with your friend, and most days y'all are giggling about something. 

We're happy we can blurt out "two years!" when folks ask but Hollywood marriages last two years sometimes so it doesn't feel like an accomplishment. We're on the same page about this so don't go thinking Brett married an insensitive pessimist. Last week we discussed our expectations for our anniversary. 

"Do you want a present?"
"Not really. Do you?"
"No."

We elected to put our honeymoon cookbook to good use and make a Portuguese supper AND we'd sit at a real table to eat it. Brett is still using our dining room table as his desk so we've been eating with plates in our lap since March. (We have lots of fun.) Earlier this summer Brett tracked down a favorite bottle of wine we shared at supper one night in Porto. He strategically took on this task in the summertime so that a bottle of wine shipped to America from a tiny, unknown winery in Portugal would get here in time for us to share it again on our anniversary. It showed up just a few weeks later, ruining Brett's demi-surprise, and leaving us in suspense to see if we actually liked that bottle or if it was just one of those nights where your tongue tricks you into thinking that this wine tastes better than most. That happens sometimes. 

We saved the bottle and had a taste last night. I'm happy to report that it's great and we feel smug and embarrassed and tickled that we have "a wine".

So we ate supper and I put on my dress (why only wear it once?) and we lightly mused about our life together. 

"You're a great person to have around."

"I love our life."

"Well great!"

"You happy?"

"Yeah! You?"

"Yep!"

"Ok."

"Good!"

The worst part of being married is waiting around for them to make decisions. Especially when you've already made the decision and you only asked to be polite, because you already know what they're going to say. You need to create the illusion that they have free will. But now they're hemming and hawing and half the day passes. Then they finally decide what you knew they'd decide but it's 5 o'clock and you don't want to anymore. 

Sometimes you disagree about things and then you have to tough it out and wait for things to go good again. Marriage is a lot of waiting. Lucky for Brett "The Sloth" Eisenhauer, I'm debilitatingly patient.

"Oh Ms. Union! I'm so sorry, we forgot you were here! I'll have the doctor bring you right through."

"That's no problem. I was enjoying the wallpaper."

The best part of being married is peeking in on another person (ideally, your favorite person) as they maneuver through a day. What a strange lovely person you've married. It furthers my studies of human behavior with a subject that will tell me every detail about their thought process. Why did you place that spoon just there? What are you thinking about when you tie your shoes? Don't you think your beard trimmings will clog that drain? Walk me through your unconcern." 

Brett's happy responses to these kind of questions almost always make me laugh out loud which is what Brett claims is the best part of marriage. "Making you honk."

As I scrolled through Ellie and Caroline's wedding photos, I came across a big group photo and zoomed in on us, as you do, and I just think this sliver of us is perfect. That's the exact face Brett makes at me while he watches me stagger through a day, and boy do I stagger. Meanwhile I'm usually just so thrilled he's still here.