October

In October I was at a loss to pump my own gas. I've been a proud gas pumper since 15, maybe earlier if you count the times I asked Mom and Dad to let me do it. But there I was, squeezing and shimmying the pump to no avail. I canceled the transaction and started again. Credit, yes. Zip code, 29412, receipt, no. Insert the nozzle, press the big button, squeeze the handle and .... nothing. I looked around me for hidden cameras. Is this some kind of joke? 

I did this three times, canceled the last attempt again and backed my car up to the pump behind me. Credit, zip, receipt, squeeze and .... seriously, what gives? I studied the panel in front of me. Red pump or blue pump? Blue pump is the same color as my 89 ethanol-cheapest-gas blend. Red pump is the same color as the 91-premium-gas. I don't want premium. I want the cheap blue gas. I marched my indignation into the gas station.

"Excuse me?" I said to the short man behind the counter. 
He spun to face me. He was a she. 
"Hello Ma'am. Either something's wrong with your pumps or I'm as simple as my Mom says I am."

The butch woman laughed at me and explained the basics of gas pumping. 

"I've been successfully pumping for years," I assured her. "I did all those things. I think it might just be me," and I smiled with as much charm as an imbecile could muster. She made me go try again, certain that her Intro to Gas seminar was all I needed. I thanked her and stepped outside again. Attempt number 4 and .... nothing. I oozed back into the shop.

"I told you it was me!"
The tough gal came out from behind her counter and walked over to the pump with me. 
"Put your card in..." etc. and then I reached for the blue handle. 
"Don't you want regular gas?" she asked.
"Indeedles," By now she was an old friend. 
"Then you want the red handle."
"The red handle is supreme."
"No it isn't."
"But they're the same color."
"All gas is the same color."
"Don't you do that! Blue for regular. Red for supreme. See the colors?" and I darted my pointer finger between the pump handles and the coordinating colored options."
"The red handle does all three options. The blue handle is separate. It's ethanol free gas."
"Have y'all thought of labelling these things?"
She grinned at me. "It's not usually a problem."

I remained outraged by the misunderstanding and thanked her sheepishly for walking me through an everyday process. She winked at me and went back inside. I was indignant all day. 

Other October highlights include Grace's homecoming, a brief Edisto beach visit, and a plethora of full-sized weddings. It was a busy month. For a minute there it felt like life before Covid. 

Scenes from October, starting with my beautiful mama.

Babies took over the Edisto visit.

We FINALLY got a bed. Good riddance to floor sleeping.

Brett divides his time between jealous girlfriends. 

Brett called in a Chipotle order. I picked it up and found this offense. The employee gave me a strange look when I asked for the order. On the right there, I pushed Brett down into a hole and wouldn't let him up. We do this often and it's endlessly amusing.

I had to call in the big guns for a Boone Hall wedding early in the month. Mom, Brett, and Aunt Melody came to help me get all the greens out in time and look how beautiful it all turned out.

The next weekend I had to enlist sweet friend Jessie to help with a wedding that took place on the most magical piece of property out in Hollywood. Oooh it was a great old house on the water with the best trees and a big horse pasture. The last wedding of the month was on a big empty chuck of land along the Ashley River and Brett loved it so much he suggested we kill off our parents and use the inheritance to make an offer on the property. 

If we just didn't like them so much....