Say Cheesy

With the hiring of our wedding photographer came the option of doing engagement photos. We said, "No thanks" and carried on with our life. Brett especially hated the idea of a picture of us standing side-by-side, hand-in-hand except that we're in the middle of an empty field and one of us is holding a balloon. You know, weird millennial kind of photographs.

But two months later I realized we have very few pictures together because he's rarely inclined to document things and though I take lots of pictures of him, I'm never in them. I realized this pattern will only continue and we'll age into old farts and only have our wedding pictures to prove that sometimes we do stand side-by-side. I think engagement pictures are corny and insincere and I frequently let out hearty guffaws as I scroll though Instagram and see couples in matching outfits dancing a waltz in a public place. How humiliating. I told our photographer that we changed our minds and we'll do it! (Poor Brett) BUT we're not coordinating outfits or going out in public. You're coming to us.

So Taylor came over and we leered at her camera like the two awkward nerds we are. We elected to make coffee to distract ourselves and keep busy. She a did a good job trying make us look normal. We sat on the couch, sat on the chair, stood around in the kitchen, and sat in the sunny room. Then we went outside and sat on various porches and walked around in the yard hand-in-hand and at one point she asked us to dance and boy those pictures are awkward. We also stood in an ant bed for a photo that resulted in my looking unusually hefty. I dismissed it with "the camera adds ten pounds." but then Brett asked how many cameras were on me.

Here we are watching water boil.

And here's Brett wishing he was anywhere else.

I'll also share Pippa's thoughts on the matter.

Towards the end of our photoshoot, Taylor had us hold hands and run a short distance. I tried to picture where she was going with this and decided I would run like I've seen girls run in the commercials. Meanwhile Brett was running with a sense of hindered competition and when I noticed he had his tongue out I chuckled softly, distracting his focus, and he tripped on stick. Then I cackled and she didn't make us run anymore.

Of the 300 hundred edited phots she sent back to us, this last one is my favorite. But I do want you to know that it came to be because she told Brett to whisper a compliment to me and he told me he how much he loves my manly hands.

Taylor Rae Photography

I should add for Taylor's sake that she's wonderful photographer. The moments she froze in time are so lovely that I wish they were pictures of someone else so that it wouldn't be narcissistic to cover every wall of my house with them. You folks get to see my favorite silly ones because I can't go sharing anything too personal. That would contradict my tough exterior. 

Palm Trees & Tropical Tantrums

As is unofficial tradition we ventured south for a weeklong laze in the balmy Florida Keys. “We” includes Mom, Dad, Me, Brett, Carolyn, David, Jordan, Margie, Alston, Kate, and for three rough days, Ellen. 

We start our venture with the important note that we only drove six hours the first day, spending the night in Titusville, Florida and because hotel rooms were inordinately pricy that Friday, we only got one room so Dad and Brett shared a bed that night and watching them squirm about it was the greatest thing. Though they pretended to be disgusted, they both tell the story frequently and with gusto.

Carolyn and David were already at our rental home when we arrived. We did things differently this time and instead of renting a place in our usual spot, we upgraded ourselves to a nicer house on a larger Key and while we enjoyed and partook in the many amenities it provided, we came to the conclusion that you don’t come to the keys to live the high life. We missed the old ramshackle, hippie-style beach trip. Jordan, Margie, Alston, and Kate made their way to the house by midnight and we all woke up the next day ready for laughs and snacks.

Highlights of our Keys venture include feeding big iguanas, enjoying poolside meals, beach visits, Carolyn’s Mick Jagger impression, fishing trips, snorkeling treks, tarpon feeding, book reading, a quick jaunt to the Hemmingway House, multiple family meals, and a standup paddle board with no rudder. Towards the end of our stay, Ellen and her black cloud arrived and I was extra put out about it. You know my stance on travelling with Ellen so it's my fault for having optimistic expectations. She duped me this time because she had a “Keys Countdown” and was so excited about all the upcoming Keys things so I was certain she would really live up her three days. But no.

One evening Brett carried a stubborn Ellen out of bed, through the house, down the stairs and across the patio to a lounge chair where the rest of us were sitting and chatting. Ellen acted as deadweight and even held on to door frames and railings to make our hero’s attempt even more exhausting. She sat for an agreed upon twenty minutes and then went back upstairs and sat in bed. Though things like this make up the large percentage of my Ellen memories for this trip, I’m probably not being entirely fair and will therefore concede that she had about two good hours each day. 

Wigs - And Hayden's Noteworthy Bone Structure

For Dad's birthday last week I had my family over for supper and then surprised the Old Man with his favorite fellas. Though I had intended only for a celebratory drink or two, Erik's girlfriend (who is actually my friend and I strategically set them up and now they really like each other and if it all works out I'll never stop taking the credit for it,) well she knows the Unions well enough to know how we love wigs. She's a very creative and artsy gal, so naturally she has a great collection of wigs and hair peices from various costume parties and Halloween ensembles. She brought these over for the Big Guy's birthday and it made the whole celebration.

Just like last time, Hayden shocked us with his ability to pull off each and every hairstyle.
The best notion of this whole thing is how much the guys enjoyed having long hair. They admired themselves in the mirror, stroked their long blond locks, and swapped wigs over and over. I heard Erik say, "No wonder girls play dress up. Is this what it's like? This is so fun!"
The second best notion, was how hard Jenny laughed at Hayden. See her laughing the last photo? That was easily thirty minutes into the nonsense.

An Evening At Home

The poorly timed Union Home Renovation Project is in full swing. I say poorly timed because everyone is assuming that I'm making my folks fix up their house on account of my backyard wedding in the Fall. Every time I have a wedding vendor come over to scout out the place, I have to state for the record that my parents were doing this anyways. And even though I asked Dad to hold off until after the wedding, he ignored this request because he likes the thrill of the challenge to get it all done on time. Though I originally objected, I'm now a full fledged supporter of the work site as it all looks really wonderful and open and now I wish we had done this years ago.

Since there isn't anywhere to sit in the house, Mom and Dad ordered pizza for supper and carried it out to the end of the dock. This is the first we've been able to get out there since the last hurricane came through. It's still just as special as it was before. It just needs a little character.

But heres' the best little tidbit. Back in 2015 I wrote this post about Dad's plum tree. Go on, read it. Refresh yourself.
Because I noticed a little purple gem and told the Old Man he'd better come outside to look at something.