Amber Dawn

Mom warned me not to post this. She's afraid I'll offend someone. Perhaps. I think people should toughen up a little. Just a little. Why pretend you don't partake in the ridicule of stereotypical situations hmm?

Anyways Carolyn, Georgia, I was tasked with creating an identity for one of my classes. This one's for you two.

"Amber Dawn Driggers is a 23 years old single mother living in the mountains with her brothers Darrell and Dewayne. She graduated from Simpleton Creek High School and went on to earn a certificate from the Hoboken School of Nail and Hair Care. Her daughter, Baby Star, has a perpetual rash that no cream can soothe. In her spare time Amber Dawn enjoys riding the four wheelers down to Emmett’s Bait n’ Tackle with her friend Brit-Knee. Baby Star’s father, T.J., works at the local Auto Parts store and takes Baby Star on the weekends, leaving Amber Dawn to tend to her dog Princess, and her 8 Pit Bull puppies. When not working in the hair salon, Amber Dawn organizes the highly competitive Little Miss Hackensack pageant."

And I proudly accompanied it with this drawing- sorry its so blurry.

After I turned this in, I discovered that I misinterpreted the assignment entirely. I'm not quite sure what my professor will think when he reads this. I'm mildly embarrassed.

Stinky

Twenty-four years ago today little Belly was born and Oh what a disast, I mean, joy it has been.

Happy Birthday Stinky. We love you




most of the time.

Gourds n' Things

As of late, the majority of my free time has been devoted to making Boone Hall a Fall Time place. By that I mean cleaning gourds, painting pumpkins, stuffing clothes with styrofoam peanuts, painting a barn, and furiously watering mums. I'm exhausted!

We've been setting up for our Pumpkin Patch and Haunted House. I've been tasked with "artistic" duties on account of "studying art". The trouble here is that I "study" art. Not crafts. I'm no Martha Stewart! I find this all quite stressful however no one else seems particularly concerned about anything thus, I carry on. Nervous and unsure and a little bit sweaty. 

Look at this mess.

But have no fear. It will turn into a Family Friendly menagerie of Halloween crap and candy.

At the end of the day, when the sun in done branding my shorts tan into the back of my thighs, I've been painting a barn. For an odd reason that perplexes me and the other Boone Hall folk, my boss insisted on having a painting of an American flag for people to stand in front for picture taking. Halloween has never been a patriotism evoking holiday for me but I do what I'm told. Now the guys are insisting I paint a Mexican flag on the other side. Yeah yeah. I'll get to it when I get to it. I've spent a week trying to work out the dimensions and spacing for those blasted 50 stars. 50!!!

The guys are quite invigorated by the cool weather and have been cutting up more than normal. Not that I mind. They keep me entertained when I'm forced to stand around selling veggies. The other day one of them was running through the fields, flapping his arms like a turkey. This was his attempt at scaring away a family of geese that have set up camp in the tomato fields and peck at and poop on everything. Gilberto has taken to "overseeing" things from the comfort of his golf cart while Erik and I are training for an arm wrestling competition that I've instated for December. He thinks he's gonna win. Psshhh!

Kinsfolk

As I continue blobbing my way from one thing to the next mi familia has been very busy. Mom has been on a furniture rearranging rampage. She has come to hate the way things look and is coming up with her own cooky solutions to these eye-sores. In more important Mom news, she was able to get her work hours down to a more tolerable chunk of time. She is most thrilled with this and even gets to be home for her afternoons.

Dad has had to go back to school. I have been more entertained by this than anything else lately on account of the foul mood Realty School puts him in and the fact that he goes off on the stupidity of such institutions. Meanwhile I sit in the corner, grinning like a fool at hearing my own preachings coming out of Dad's mouth. Then he catches himself and informs me that he in fact learned a lot today and if he was 22 he would really enjoy it and have nothing to complain about. Luckily for his non-existant patience, tomorrow is his last day. I'm put out about that as I would like the thought of having to continue such blasphemy for nine months at a time to really sink in.

Ellie Bells has quit her job!!ish. She put in her two weeks yesterday on account of not having her heart in the selling of Mom Clothes. I'm not sure what she will do now. I haven't talked to her. She was asleep when I got home yesterday and at the moment she is at work, though she should be on her way soon, toting sweets to ease my cravings. I'll keep you posted on the Ellen front. 

There is no news on the Laura front. It's all dry and bare there. I continue forcing myself to find entertainment within my lifeless classes and have recently taken up the harmonica. Now don't go thinking I can play the thing but I enjoy blasting our silent apartment with tuneful and melodious screeches. I think the cats really like it. I've been running up quite the gas bill with my shuttle services and am spending my early evenings painting a flag on the side of a hot tin barn at work. 

That about sums things up.

These Days

I've been taking pictures of Buddy in all his glory.

And the occasional wrestling bout...

And Jared dragged Ellen around by her hair.

Nada

After such a thrilling and action packed summer I am really struggling to entertain you people. I sit in a classroom all morning and stand outside all afternoon. All there is to it. I got nothin'. I haven't even been taking pictures on account of not going anywhere or doing anything. I'm still tempted to put up more Greece and Wales pictures. There are so many stories I never got to. Alas, I must stop living in the past.

Speaking of past, Mattie and I have booked a cheap-o three day cruise in December. Karrissa and Kelsey are coming as well and I am so excited about it I can hardly stand it. I know what you're thinking and no, I can't afford it but you only live once and man can surely live on bread alone. Mattie and I are also jokingly(?) planning our return visit to Greece complete with sleeping on the beach when we're homeless and begging my old man suitors for food. This will be good. Character building even.

Now if I could just get through the next nine months.

A Scholastic Update

Well to start with, this stank!!!

Mondays I have class from 9am to 10 pm. This day includes sociology, swimming, a biology lab, and painting. This is the only day I have that is quite this offensive though tuesdays, consisting of a Biology lecture and a class on contemporary art, is a close second. The rest of my week is most enjoyable as I am out by either 11 or 12 though I do go straight to work these days. My summer time -free time is gone. Just gone!

Let start with sociology. Social Change. I have an adorable little old man professor. He has a wiry white beard and Regis Philbin's accent. He so little and sweet and I just can't listen to a word he says. I don't know why. I understand the words he uses but I just don't know what the crap he wants me to take away from his ramblings. Rambling, by the way, is putting it nicely. What is it week three now? We've been trying to define globalization since day one. He gets side tracked talking about historical government sysyems and Osama Bin Laden's Citizen watch. Luckily he only gives take home tests.

My swimming class is instructed by an attractive Turkish man. The whole thing makes me very uncomfortable. I don't like attractive people. I share a lane with a very bold young lady who blatantly grunts and "Mmm's" when his shirt hem rises above his belt, exposing his tan Ken-doll torso. The suggestive comments she makes under her breath always shock me and make me giggle nervously. This mortifies me.  Every time he looks at us we're gazing up at him and giggling.

I don't care much for my Biology class but the lab is ok on account of being partnered with 4 other kids as blissfully ignorant as myself. We seem to finish last of all the other groups because we spend the entire 3 hour class period slinging insults at each other and laughing at our own cluelessness. One of the girls in my group works at Boone Hall. She works in the market cafe thus we have never seen each other nor will we. But we enjoy sharing tales about all the sweet Mexicans.

Then there's painting class. I've yet to go. Yeah yeah.

Finally I have a class who's mission is to expose us to and define contemporary art. I particularly hate this class because it's 4 hours long and I dislike contemporary art. Slide after slide of bad paintings and weird body-part sculptors. This class has two professors. One of which is short-fused and looks like a disheveled John Hamm. The other one must only be a few years older than me and though I do agree he dresses well, he seems to have all the girls in a tizzy and I just don't get it. I'm truly perplexed by this. He's a tiny little wrinkled man though I do greatly approve of his sense of humor.

There you have it. Might I remind you that we have to pay for this.
All this to be an acceptable member of society. Who are we impressing here?

Anyways...dock time.

Get It Together!

Since I've been home I've been making up for all the lost summer time things I missed. Beach, dock, baked goods, etc. I have gone back to work which is both productive and nostalgia inducing. I missed peaches. Peaches!! I'm immensely happy to be back in the lives of my Mexican loves and I'm secretly pleased to see a few of the Mt. Pleasant townsfolk who provide me with laughs on occasion. I have also gone back to school which as you know is a touchy topic for me. I'm back into my stupid routine of wasting away under harsh fluorescents, mentally sleeping to what sounds like Paris Hilton talking to Charlie Brown's professor. Also, I have swimming class and the water is cold.

Although, it is tough to complain when you are able to do your homework in conditions like these...

I've made up for my lost dock time, been kayaking, wandering downtown, gone to the beach, and even had a Lukas weekend. 

Aunt Carolyn had us cruisers over for an Italian Interludes Photo viewing party. We had picnic dinner in the backyard complete with Italian food and a rich gooey dessert. In viewing Dave and Colleen's pictures we must have seen over 1000 photos. Awe Geez!

I intend to get back to my routine whine, I mean updates once I can get it together. I'm real scattered these days. I've had to resort to writing things down so I remember to do them. Including my meals. 

Get it together baby!